The Next Step

Well, here I am on this journey. I have started to see some results when it comes to my size. I am losing in my midsection just from exercising. That has been the "easy" part. The hard part has been my diet. Cutting out fast food and sodas was easy. Then, I cut out fried food. This was significantly more difficult. It wasn't until I figured out that fried food was making me feel sick after eating it (how did I not know this? Was I in denial?) that I really got serious about making that change. Today was a milestone. I was at a restaurant that specialized in wonderful fried food. I ate the grilled fish. I was good. I avoided the onion rings that kept being passed by my nose, just taunting me. Tonight, I ate dinner with my parents (after a bike ride) and I had a grilled chicken sandwich on a wheat bun. It was wonderful. So, today marks the first day in which I have had no fried food. I was very proud of myself until it was pointed out to me that the dark beer that I was drinking probably negated all the progress that I had made. Damn. This is the next step. It is the step that I knew was coming, but I didn't want to admit it. Beer has to go. This makes me sad just to type it. No, I am not an alcoholic, but I do love a cold beer with friends. Now, you may say, "one beer is okay," but I have never been a one beer person. Beer with friends has been apart of my life since I was 21. I am not sure what to do different. I am not even sure If I can do this next step. It is probably the step that is holding me back from seeing real results. So, what is my motivation? I live in a family that has large men. We are genetically heavy.....actually, that's BS. It's lifestyle. I live in a family with lazy men (if you are one of these and don't like what I am saying, DEAL WITH IT!!). Recently we found out that my grandfather has to have open heart surgery. I see this and look in the mirror. Do I want that life? Do I want to not be able to get around in my later years? Do I want to even make it to my later years? This is a scary thought. I have heart disease and diabetes in my family. I have to make these changes for me. It is for my family. I don't want to leave my wife alone because I was selfish and ate whatever the hell I wanted. I want to be more like my dad. He deals with these issues, but because he is fit and active, he is able to keep it under control. So, this is what it is about. It is about life. It is about growing old with the woman I love. It is about being able to see my kids grow up and become successful. I am no longer going worry about what I look like. I am no longer going to worry about what I weighed yesterday versus today. I am going to focus on eating right and staying fit. The weight will come off (I know, I have said that before, I just need to say it again). I need to change my lifestyle. I know that this next step is going to be my hardest so far, but I have to do it. This is my breakthrough/breakdown part of my change. I don't want to be dead at the age of 50. I want to live a long and happy life. It makes me angry that I have BS'd myself to this point. This is my last chance.


Thanks for the support......
Jon